Speechless

This week had me speechless, at least I thought. Obviously, if I am blogging I have SOMETHING to say. This week has been one of those week of overloads. Something everyday and every night. New opportunities, exciting possibilities, inspiring life stories, parent co-op day at D's school...you get the point TOTAL overload. I am processing the good, the bad and the ugly.

Tomorrow my friend Abby leaves for Cambodia for at least two years. She won't have her phone number anymore and communication won't be as easy as shooting a text and to be honest I am thankful for that. I think during this season of her life she will realize how many people are so devoted to her life by showing they are willing to go the extra to communicate with her during this transition.

We had our good bye conversation tonight which we both agreed we had no idea what to say. And that's where my blog comes in. I was wondering whether to just spill the beans or to be speechless. Like, do I take the risk of sharing how much she will be missed and upsetting her or not say it and run the risk of her thinking I totally don't care she's halfway around the world? Do I ask how reliable the internet is over there and share I am totally freaked it will suck and we will never get to skype and have to start writing old fashioned letters and then forget the way her voice sounds? Ugh. I just didn't know what to say or do and I still don't.

I feel as though I am being challenged to be more than words of support. Better yet, how can I support her? Support her with works and prayers and a little bit of money....sorry, it's all we can spare! HA!

I am really scared. Not at all for her. I have a total peace she is doing the right thing and will succeed but at the same time I am scared for me. Will her life be totally, radically changed and mine stay the same? Will she come home to visit and I be the annoying friend who just totally doesn't get the real world she's lived? (read Kisses From Katie) I feel like cockroaches will become more like a random ant that's easy to overlook and dirty children, her own and the poor, her friends and the sick, the un-ignorable. I guess it challenges me to allow my life to be more sensitive here, where I am. And, no, I don't think I will ever see a roach and let it scurry off without sleeping with a broom in hand but reaching out to the poor and praying for the sick and loving orphans...yeah, I think I can do that better.

So here is to admitting I have no clue what to say tonight although I feel I have said much. I think I am feeling everything she is just from the opposite end. I am exciting, overwhelmed, challenged, sad, nervous and ready to get the ball rolling...so the two years will end! :)