"Titleful"

Dalen and Mario in between time outs hanging our holiday wreath.
Picture text I got at the annual fundraiser.

My clearance dress that was more like a girdle.

I have thought and thought of what to call this blog. I almost titled it "Titleless" until I realized the problem wasn't that I didn't have a title but that I had too many titles and couldn't settle on just one. So I am calling it "Titleful". Other titles I considered were: Disaster Relief, When Perfect Went Out The Window, Terrible Twos, or I Quit.

As I shared earlier, we had a great and exciting day planned for Saturday. My, oh my, Saturday. The day I can't forget but pray I could! Dalen woke us up bright and early. I drug out the ornaments, lights and Mario dug out our artificial tree. This tree was bought in a really nice carrying box however, it fell to pieces and had to be trashed from getting so wet in our storage shed behind our house. Mario had to run to the church to set up the stage and while he was gone I decided to make breakfast. Nothing fancy just some muffins. They were perfect on top until I got them out of the pan and realized they were complete mush on the bottom. I then realized the bottom of our oven still isn't working only the top is heating. You can imagine how delicious these were.

While waiting on Mario to get home, Dalen became so curious with the ornaments. He began throwing them and luckily none busted. After several times of him doing this he was placed in time out. After getting out of time out he sat on the box of ornaments as hard as he could. How none of them busted, I will never know! He was then placed in time out again. Finally, Mario got home and we proceeded to put up the tree. You would think Dalen would be fascinated, excited in awe of this family event but NO he was everything but. He jumped on our strand of lights making half of the strand go out. There stood our tree. Tall, lightless, topperless and skirtless. Let me tell you-she is a beauty.

After finishing the tree, Dalen went down for a nap without lunch because he ate breakfast so late. He kept napping and napping. Finally Mario woke him for his movie and buddy I wish we would have never broken the golden rule of waking a sleeping baby. He was in the whiniest worst mood EVER. I suggested he be taken to a later showing but Mario insisted it would be fine. They ventured off to Planet 51 as I ventured off to the Blind Side- a movie I have waited months to see. The theater was PACKED! My seat was on the 2nd to last row and two kids kept crinkling their popcorn bag as they fought for the next handful. Ugh.

I decided to go get my own snack where I found Mario and Dalen waiting in line as well. Dalen asked me to hold him and I did. After sometime of waiting I put him down and felt something warm and cold on my left side where I held him. Yep, you experienced moms guessed it. Dalen had peed all over me. How this happened I do not know. He had just been asked to the bathroom and had on a fresh pull up but urine always finds a way to get the best of you. There I stood, not knowing what to do and still wondering if this day was really happening. There was no way I could sit through a movie after being peed on. We all left and Dalen never finished his nap.

Saturday night I had to work our annual fund raiser at the 5 Points Museum. I put my lovely clearance dress on and proceeded to hold my breath for the night. I was placed working the door which was nice because it was somewhat quiet and I got to sit while eating on food catered by one of the best in town. After about 30 minutes of being there I notice my foot felt heavy and I heard something behind me everytime I took a step. I looked down to find the complete sole of my shoe had fallen off. Perfect. PERFECT! Not only do I have on the cheapest looking dress ever, I now get to walk around bare foot!

The noise level increased as more wine and beer was consumed. The check out table was bombarded with drunks ready to pay for their auction items that I am sure they don't remember ever bidding on. One man (who had red wine spilled all down the front of him) said, "oh my, aren't you so pretty! You look like a black velveteen goddess." Then there was a long pause as he awkwardly cocked his head to the side and asked, "Did I used to trim your hedges?" Honestly, there is nothing more unattractive then a man who is so drunk he has no idea what he is saying or so obnoxious he looks completely foolish. Another man approached the check out line completely intoxicated and said, "Hey, you pregnant?" I told him I was and he looked to his wife and said, "See, it was that easy to ask and she didn't even get mad." His wife's face grew redder by the second.

I really wish I could realize that there will never, ever be a perfect day. As long as I live, I will endure mishaps, drunks, urine stained clothes, curious onlookers but it still shakes me. I want to live an unshakable life. I want to endure these days with stamina and defense, defeating every distraction and illiminating every frustration by gripping peace.

Sunday came around and before noon Dalen had had his fingers smashed in the church door, fallen off our bed and skinned his back on Mario's bike, fallen down the church steps and bitten a chunk out of his tongue in nursery. Yes, when perfect went out the window may have been the best title.