I never in a million years thought I would ever reach 200 pounds. I should have seen all the signs coming-no exercise, fast food dinners, uncontrollable cravings-I have always ignored them. When I think back to my childhood I can honestly never remember having control of my stomach. I know that sounds silly but I honestly remember always eating way past the point of being full and finding anything in sight to sop up every last bit of butter residue left on my plate.
The picture of me in the red was about 6 months after our wedding. I was about 135 pounds. The picture of me in the yellow was on Easter and I am weighing in at a whopping 196 pounds. I look horribly unhealthy and overweight. I am totally out of shape and even though I am nauseated about eating crappy food I still do it. I blogged about a year and half ago about having no self-control in the area of eating, I lost close to 30 pounds and was actually eating pretty good and then I lost self-control again and gained all of it back and more. I refuse to blame my weight gain or bad eating habits on my pregnancy. I take full responsibility for lacking self-control. You do not have to gain a lot of weight being pregnant and you do not have to give into unhealthy cravings but I did.
I still look pregnant and still eat like I'm pregnant. I am at my whit's end with being lazy. I could go walking or eat better or not as much but it's that self-control thing. It is seriously a major prayer request in my life. I need to rule my stomach instead of my stomach ruling me. So this week I have started my journey of re-gaining self-control. Honestly, when you get to the foundation of it that is what it is all about. Yes, the cravings are hard to resist and yes, it sucks that I am the unlucky one who doesn't lose weight from running after her toddler or gaining definition in her arms from toting the kiddos, laundry baskets and grocery bags but that's just life.
So. Monday I began. I am starting slow and taking baby steps because I really need a lifestyle change. This week I am working on choosing the healthiest food selections, not eating full meals and calling them "snacks" and cutting back on my portion size. I feel like I am double the person right now. I guess that means I will have extra strength to fight against losing this never ending battle with my stomach.
Cheers, to self-control and the results it may bring!
2 comments:
good luck girlie! YOU CAN DO IT! YOU CAN DO IT! YOU CAN DO IT! YOU CAN DO IT!!
You are great! New things, new cities, a new YOU! I'm excited for you. And think of me when you feel hungry because I go to bed hungry almost every night. =( We can gripe together!!!
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