Men.

I love men. I love males. God made men. We must not hate them. Without men, none of us would exist.

These are some of the thoughts I have been chanting in my mind over and over, the last few days just so I can channel out some of the frustrations I have with that lovely gender we know as males. It is true-I do love men but there is no mistaking the fact that when they try relate to us women you are left convinced they are the most ignorant beings on the planet. Bless their hearts when they try to be encouraging you are usually left discouraged the most.

Let me just a share a few of my frustrations about men. I promise you, if one more man makes the comment that, "you will be fine" after hearing this baby will come via c-section I am going to punch him out, strap him to a gurney myself and when he wakes I will hold a power saw above him and explain to him that I will be sawing him in half, removing a vital organ from his abdomen, and then detaching a LIVE being from that organ and that he will be WIDE awake for the whole thing. Uh-huh, yes gentlemen, now are you realizing why "fine" is not an appropriate term to use when responding to a woman having a c-section? Besides, who the heck wants to be just fine? How about a "you are such a strong woman and you are going to do great!" or "I'll be praying for peace and for your doctor" or even a "Oh, wow" yeah that would do guys! But shrugging it off like I am talking about a common cold...TOTALLY unacceptable.

Come on boys, get with the program and take a few pointers. Let's switch things up a little bit. Let your mind soar and imagination run with the wind...you are laying on a gurney and you are WIDE awake and there is a doctor holding a scalpel and he is about to perform a vasectomy. Do you want your wife and church and friends telling you oh it's no big deal or they do them all the time or you will be fine? Uh no you want someone holding your hand, sympathizing the matter, and wiping your tears when you cry because I promise you-YOU WOULD if it were you. Yeah, now we're talking!

And if a woman ever tells you they are having a c-section...DO NOT ASK WHY! That is so none of your business, rude, invasive and I promise in most cases your appetite would be ruined for weeks just at the thought of why some women have to go this route. They key is sympathizing! Recognize the seriousness of the matter or acknowledge all the procedure entails but don't ever ask why! Good Lord! I am living life, not sharing my life story on Maury Provich here!

When women see a very pregnant woman they say things like, "Getting close! You have to be ready!" Men say, "Dang, I know you are ready to have that baby?" Uh, no, you don't KNOW anything! While you are chowing on chili dogs and watching Saturday filled football games, I am enduring heartburn, gas, urinating twice an hour and listening to sound breathing from my husband and son during the night because I am too miserable to sleep!

I have a great husband. I mean, he is great and I love him to death. But honestly I have about packed my bags this week. When we were snowed in and I was trying to explain to him I couldn't help but to pace back and forth and be so anxious to get out of our house, his response was, "Well, gosh babe. Just relax! Sleep or read a book!" My response was, "Well, Mario, if ya thought I could just relax do ya think I'd even be having this conversation with you? And do you think if I could just sleep I would be up pacing the floors every night?" It is NOT that easy. This morning I said to him, "I can't do this. I am going to cry." Then he looks at me and says, "Huh, do what?" I explain that I just can't make it until Wednesday. Then he responds, "Megan, please. That's only like three days." Uh wrong response. The correct response would have been, "Thank you for enduring thus far! Thank you for giving me another beautiful baby in just three days. I know it seems like a long time but I am here to do whatever it takes to make you comfortable in the meantime." I mean really-three days! That's like 72 hours and if I pee on average twice an hour that's like 144 more trips to the bathroom! Uh-huh, now you see all the details you overlook by being quick to speak?

Ok, so this blog is totally exaggerated in hopes maybe someone can laugh at the differences between genders. My husband is great and no, I did not really almost move out this week. You really do have to know me to understand my humor but hopefully this blog will make all of us think. Just because something is normal doesn't make it peaceful. Just because someone may feel alone doesn't mean you should act as though you know where they are or what they are feeling but rather be in tune with the Holy Spirit to encourage. I know I lack in this area. I want to be better though. I feel as a Christian it's our duty to relate to the needs, fears, frustrations of others and just because you haven't been there doesn't mean you can't relate. I think we so often mistake relating to others for being in their shoes at one time or another but relating can mean simply listening, praying with someone, sending a card-relating with someone in a way that let's them know even though you may not know from experience, you care.

I am so ready!

Dalen and Livi at church.

Dalen loves cupcakes!

Writing a letter.

Even So Come Quickly Cola Leese

I so know this baby is coming quickly. Even though everything is scheduled for Wednesday, my body is still making all the proper adjustments to have this little girl. I can tell because I have become extremely irritable, constantly itching to be on the go, not sleeping even though I am exhausted and anti-company. I don't know why but with really big events in life, I life to keep a low profile and have a lot of spacious room. So, if you come knocking on my door, come bearing gifts or of course, food. Preferably, hors' dourves, it makes me feel not AS guilty to justify I have been "snacking" all day as opposed to eating full meals all day.

The whole snow situation hasn't helped my irritability any. There is NO escape from my extremely loud toddler, nothing to do at home and I become enraged when I realize how much we pay for cable to watch absolutely NOTHING! I actually prayed to go in labor last night JUST to have to go to the hospital so I could get out of the house. Yeah, some prayers just don't get answered. Dalen usually doesn't like the cold or snow but Mario took him out in it last night. He had a blast! He was dressed in four layers and could barely walk! I am not sure whether to be thankful I am pregnant and couldn't engage of their rough play or to be jealous I didn't get to slide down our elevated front yard on a plastic bin lid. I am convinced it wouldn't have held up after I sat on it anyway.

Here is Dalen staring on our Winter Wonderland.

Here is my husband yelling at me and lecturing me that it is totally fine to peg our 2 year old as hard as he wishes with snowballs. Yeah, I noticed it was fine when Dalen laughed hardest the harder he threw them.
Dalen got this coat for Christmas and it's a size 3T-4T but it was the only one that would fit over all of his layers! I love it. He looks like a little eskimo!
Dalen is supposed to have a birthday party with a girl in his class today. I don't know if we will be making that or not! Lord, I surely hope so. I have been walking through our house pacing thinking, "Honey someone shrunk our house or we are busting at the seems in this place!" If I don't get out of here soon I am going to need padded walls...literally.

Currently, Dalen is eating Oreo cookies for breakfast-it was either that or hearing him whine about wanting them. Give me some credit, I am picking and choosing my battles at this point people! Now I am just wondering how he is going to let out his sugar rush inside these 4 walls! YIKES!

I have lost my mind and gained a belly!

Oh my gosh, this sums up how I feel! I have heard women talk about forgetting things or being absentminded due to pregnancy but honestly I just thought it was a lame excuse. Trust me, I have met some pregnant ladies that I am convinced use pregnancy as a crutch to get out of things or deny responsibilities. But it's real-it is SO real! Lately I know my mind is so far gone that I won't even pretend to be sane!

The other day I was so focused on keeping my balance (which is TOTALLY off with this pregnancy) while putting on my underwear that I soon realized I was putting my leg through my bra strap...needless to say I didn't get it very far! Oh me, oh my!

The only thing really we need to get done around here is laundry. It is the household task that never ends and I am sure our loads will multiply, especially having a girl. My thoughts are just running wild all the time and I get so distracted thinking that I forget what task I am trying to complete. I was standing at the dryer, thinking of what kind of clothes I would wash next (whites, towels, coloreds?) and then I before I knew it I had taken all of the clothes from the dryer and put them back in the washer!

This morning I hunted at least ten minutes for my keys before I remembered I had started my car like 20 minutes before my search began! Yeah, I wasted so much gas! And I can't tell you how many times I have walked around with my glasses on and said to myself, "Gosh, things look blurry with these things on." Then I realize it looks blurry because I never took my contacts out! LOL! I am going mad!

Dalen has had a little cold and thank God his jabbering stopped me before I put nasal drops in his mouth instead of his nose! What am I going to do when I have two kiddos to deal with?! I am starting to make my self nervous! At least I have an organized and focused husband though...WRONG! I think this mind thing is contagious! My poor husband is losing it too!

I asked him three times the other night at dinner to grab Dalen's sippy cup from the counter and he would go in the kitchen every time but come out with something besides his cup! Yesterday, I asked him to get the clothes from the dryer for me and I would fold them. He walked in the dining room and came in the living room without the clothes. I reminded him again and then he left to go to work without ever bringing them to me!! LOL! The night before he barricaded our back door with trash bags full of donations to Goodwill (just so he wouldn't forget them) and somehow totally got out the back door without taking them to the donation drop off! He text me yesterday saying, "I am almost leaving to come home, need anything?" An hour and 20 minutes passed and I text him saying, "Did you forget how to get home?" I was afraid he was on his way to Florida because his thoughts were distracted by how badly we both need a vacation.

It's funny now but I promise we have either driven each other crazy or pregnancy has made us mad. Well, onto some good news. I am having my c-section next Wednesday and I got all of my info for that day today at my LAST doctor's appointment. YAY! I am literally up at night wondering what this baby will look like. I can NOT wait to hold her, bathe her and love her face to face.

The Great Exchange.

I believe God still speaks to His people. His spirit is alive and His word more relevant than ever. I will confess there are certain areas of our life that are not very certain right now. They seem to be hazy and hard and though we pray and seek God, we haven't received that word or that certain direction we need for a time such as this. A million times I have prayed and wished this cup would pass from us or that God would wait to serve it on our table but for whatever reason, we drink up-now.

The gospel in a nutshell-God came to Earth from Heaven to be the ULTIMATE sacrifice. We often refer to life's sacrifice's and all they have cost us but if you really reflect upon God's word we find we have never made a true sacrifice, we have only made exchanges. Truthfully, we never give God anything without receiving it back in a glorified state. I realized this today. I mean, I really realized this, as I spent time with God and realized I had a great need to purge much in my heart and mind.

As I began to do this with much resistance and fear, I realized a great exchange had occurred. All of things I began to purge were now gloriously served back and when this occurred, it was only then did I see what these things had truly cost me. You see, as I began to purge feelings of rejection God wrapped his arms around me and in a supernatural way I felt his loving arms around me. Every bitter bone in my body received strength to forgive. Feelings of hatred were dissolved with the ability to love again. When God allows these supernatural occurrences to happen it is then and only then do we realize the cost of junk in our life.

I find myself tonight now bingeing on his blessings and the truth of Isaiah 61:3. That scripture became so real through personal experience that I have been saying all day, "So that's what that scripture is about?!" I know because it happened. Right in my living room God exchanged my trash and cashed it in for a treasure. I paid no penalty or interest, it was all covered by his grace. Thank God for grace, pray for mercy and allow a great exchange to take place in your life.

Family Funnies

There's Dalen. Mouth wide open, talking 90 miles a minute. He was actually trying to convince me he didn't have to use the bathroom but I KNEW he did. I am not sure where we went wrong with potty training but he actually hates sitting on the potty anymore. He screams, kicks and sometimes cries. I guess I will have two kids in diapers. Well, one in Pull-Ups and one in diapers to be exact. Ugh! Maybe he will win the Regis and Kelly Cutest Baby Contest so we won't have to pay for them.

Anyways, I am not feeling any better today and I am ashamed to say I did absolutely NOTHING! I haven't even done an entire load of laundry. I picked Dalen up from school with Mario in a pajama top and black stretch pants-thankfully he isn't old enough to be embarrassed with how terrible I look these days. He still ran to me and laughed when he saw us at the door. Oh how times will change with age and reputation.

Dalen could count to 10 when he 1st started school, then he started skipping a few numbers and now he only counts to three. He is in trouble so much he counts, "one-two and a half-three!" He doesn't even say two! Lord help us. As if thats not bad enough he typically shouts, "time out!" right after he gets to three.

Mario has totally made Dalen John Mayer's newest fan by wearing out his newest album. Anyone know his newest song Half Of My Heart? For days now Dalen has been walking around saying, "Daddy, I've got a tit-ate-shun (situation)".

We are watching basketball on tv and Dalen saw one of the players with a tattoo on his arm and said, "Hey, Daddy! He got a stamp! Tool (cool)!" HAHAHA!

Tonight we also watched Wheel Of Fortune (yes, too much tv I know-stone me later-but I kind of classify it as an educational experience HA!) and Dalen shouted Vanna White as soon as she came out. Then he proceeded to look closely at Pat and say, "Aw, her Dad is so pitty (pretty)!" LOL! Oh, what would my world be without Dalen?

We just explained to Dalen he would not be watching Olivia The Pig because American Idol is coming on. Of course, he still hooked on the "Boob Boxer" and he proceeded to pull up his shirt, point to each nipple and explain, "I have a boob. But you not touch them!" Thank the Lord he has learned some parts are off limits!

Oh Happy Day!

Just in case you don't know me well, I keep things REAL and HONEST. Yes, I know I should have a more positive attitude and post an uplifting scripture or even better yet a super-spiritual status on my Facebook but I'd rather just be transparent. I'd rather let the whole entire world know that loving God and being happily married and enjoying parenthood has seen it's days of cloudy forecasts.

The last few weeks I have been having bouts of dizziness, lightheadedness (is that a word), and feeling down right crappy. At first we thought it was my low fluid-then maybe dehydration-then maybe low iron-and today we don't know what the heck it is but the feelings have NOT subsided. My thorough and wonderful doctor told me to go to L&D today to have things checked. We found out I am having frequent contractions but the baby and all my blood work looks great. I also found out you can have contractions that do not progress your cervix and cause dilation (I mean really what is the point of those) I got a shot (two actually, one in each cheek) that burns so bad they shot me up with a numbing agent as well. I don't think my young (and very nice nurse) realized with a caboose as BIG as mine you have to use double the numbing stuff because it did NOT help. Oh well, what's a little burning sensation along with round ligament pain, dizziness, nausea and the worst irritability I have ever dealt with.

Right before I was discharged my doctor called and said she wanted me to have the shot I got because she thinks I have an awful bladder infection which can cause all of my symptoms. Wow, I never ever in my lifetime thought a bladder infection could make you feel this way. My sister kept Dalen while I was at the doctor. Livi and Dalen were supposed to be taking a nap. I think you can tell that didn't happen...

I love God but sometimes I don't understand his ways. I love my marriage-it's an endless sleepover but let's get real sometimes the popcorn isn't as buttery as we like it. And I love my babies but there are days where I am totally convinced I qualify as the worst mother on the planet. Sorry, for all you positive minded people that just can't believe I'd be this honest.
My husband took this picture on Sunday. I love it. It's one of the last naps me and Dalen will take for a while on the couch. I doubt my incision will be wanting to be so cramped and of course Mario and I have already had the discussion who she will lay with on Sunday afternoons. Well fellow bloggers, here I am-in the buff. My buns are just a burnin' (STILL), I feel like crap and my only goal for tomorrow is to sleep all day while Dalen is at school. I am praying for sunshine tomorrow, relief from pain, and strength to get out and about.

Our Last Hoo-Rah!

Last night was Parent's Night Out-the last one before baby #2 makes her grand entrance. I am sure it will be a while before she is sent to enjoy endless play at the local church Dalen attends this amazing night at so we kept calling last night our last hoo-rah. Yay, for gift cards which made our dinner practically FREE (well, almost. Good Lord anyone checked the prices on Outback's menu? Are they catching the fish and hunting the beef in Australia and flying it 1st class back to little Cleveland??)

Anyway enough complaining about money. We had a GREAT dinner and I tried something new-Chicken and Swiss Sandwich. I even got the sampler portion of their Chocolate Thunder From Down Under dessert-YUM! After dinner we came home, collapsed on the couch and fearfully set our phone alarms JUST IN CASE our heavy eyes got to weighty to keep open. Luckily, we managed to stay awake and talk and laugh, with our eyes closed for the most part. HA! My body is falling apart!

Last night was a nightmare. Oh, well not exactly a nightmare because I wasn't asleep AT ALL! Mario left to pick Dalen up alone and by the time he was back I sleeping heavily until Dalen charged in with an art project he made. Dalen woke up all throughout the night. The two times I actually fell asleep I was awakened by him screaming out my name. I thought our nights would be sleepless due to a newborn but I think Dalen is in a little competition with who can be up more! Finally, Dalen was put in our bed. I tossed for about 20 minutes, went to the bathroom (a total of 7 times last night) and when I came back Mario had every inch of the comforter and Dalen had every inch of my side. I was too scared to move him in fears the beast would awaken again. So, I snatched my pillow and quilt and slept on the couch....UNTIL Dalen came in kissing my eyelids saying over and over, "Baby, baby...u not feeling well?" I thought maybe if I ignored him he'd move on to another pincushion but I was it this am. After a while of sweet kisses and soft whispers I was then jabbed in the cheek and heard, "Honey! You heard me!" I thought I was going to scream. What exactly does a woman have to do in this house for some sleep? Finally I got up, went to our room and didn't wake up until 10:30.

I am still exhausted! Ugh! On a brighter note...our bags are packed, the boppy slipcover has been washed, the dresser assembled, diaper genie ready for some stinky ones and my heart is so excited. Oh Lord, please if it's not too much to ask could she just come today?

Family Funnies

14 more days until THE day. I have to confess I am not feeling very well today and have been a little discouraged with just life in general. On days like today I know God gave me a son who is so hilarious to keep me going and make laugh-while crying (I am such a multi-tasker!).

This whole post is going to be dealing with private parts, meanness and things people usually don't mention. So don't say I didn't tell ya so.

I have a basket of tampons and pads under my sink-it's just the most convenient place for them. Have you ever noticed all of the good women products are in the best and bright colors?? Or should I say irresistible colors? I am not sure what has been drawing Dalen to this basket the last few weeks but it's been pretty hilarious. A few weeks ago he pulled out a pad that he had unwrapped and said, "Here Mommy, here's your band aid!" After asking him who told him those were band-aids he responded, "Daddy!" I told Mario we probably shouldn't describe them as band-aids because when they are used he will think I am hurt. So today Dalen pulled out another pad and said, "Here Mommy, here's your diaper!" Mario also told him that. GREAT! So now my son is probably telling his teachers at school I wear band-aids on my crotch, I am not potty trained and I only have one boob (read previous post).

Did anyone see American Idol last night?? Anyone catch the "boob boxer"? Oh my word! HILARIOUS! If you missed it...GOOGLE IT! Dalen surely thought it was hilarious and sat laughing with his mouth open most of the time. Dalen called my dad on commercial break and Dad asked him if he saw the lady shaking her big chest everywhere. Dalen said, "No, Dad! She was shaking her BIG boobs!" Where did he learn the word boob? And why is it such an obsession?

Dalen is just growing more and more curious about human anatomy. He's only two but trust me I know how his mind works, if you don't give him an explanation to everything his curiosity will only grow and you will be left with disastrous results. I got a new nightgown which I typically do not wear but at this point they are just more comfortable. A few nights ago Dalen pulled it up and said, "Hey I got a penis! What you got?" UGH! Thank God I never wear dresses to church anymore!

I don't know if it has to do with being a Psychology major or what but I do know these types of questions and situations can't be avoided and shouldn't be avoided, it's all a part of parenting. They are going to happen and to be honest I don't get embarrassed but man, I really want to answer questions the right way and pace ourselves-my Lord at this rate he'll be ready for the birds and the bees like, uhh, tomorrow! YIKES! We are starting to gradually not allow baths with us two and trying to keep him out of the bathroom when I am in there but just last night I caught him peeking in the bathroom. When I caught him I said, "Dalen, what are you looking at?" He barged in full force and squatted down and looked closely and said, "Oh my gosh! Where's your penis?" At least he won't go around telling people I have one of those. Then I may be rumored to be the second pregnant "man" in America!

Today Dalen got to go to Chick-Fil-A and play on the playground. He had a blast and some poor girl had a meltdown after getting up a few of the stairs to the playground. I honestly think she was having a panic attack. Me and my friend watched for a minute and realized this girl, who was like 8!, would not come down and her mom was too big to fit up the steps to get her! (I personally think that playground should be a fire hazard b-c if you are a pound over 100 you probably couldn't fit up them.) Finally a skinny mom (which wasn't me, HA, I am sure you all guessed that) rescued the girl who was crying and totally beside herself. Later, when I went to get Dalen a few grandmothers were in there laughing and told me that Dalen (who was really concerned about the situation) had asked the girl, "Why are you tying (crying)?" The mom explained from down below, "Because she is really scared!" The grandmother then told me Dalen slapped the stair and said, "Oh my dosh (gosh) dirl (girl)! Dats why you tying (crying)? That's so stupid!" Wow, wonder where he gets his sympathetic side from??

15 More Days

Well, folks, here we are, all three of us. Dalen insisted he be in this picture too and I didn't decline. My mind is in overdrive and my body is in neutral. One thing I am just thanking God for is the beautiful weather the last two days! Yesterday, we were outside letting Dalen draw on the driveway with sidewalk chalk and it felt wonderful to be out soaking in some natural sunlight.

Let me inform you of where the Hood family is. The nursery is not painted and we don't even have a crib. (We decided to get a dresser over a crib since baby Cola has a playpen she will sleep in for a while.) Dalen has become more and more curious about human anatomy on a daily basis. (He recently pinched a friend's breast and told her, "My mom has ONE boob too". Hmm, not sure what people think when he says that behind my back but just in case he has told you this I can assure you I have two.) My car has an awful oil leak and we are in no financial position to get another one. My husband is job hunting. (long story) I have been so overwhelmed by the love and support of my friends recently. The 22nd is the last date night me and Mario will have as parents of one.

I just love the thought of being able to hold my precious baby girl soon but 15 days seems so far away. I know things will change a lot around here but right now I am trying to pace myself and enjoy the time that's left with things just the way they are.

The Whole World

I never realized just how much attention this little guy has gotten from so many family and friends. He has been the center of our worlds for so long now. I think so much baby talk is really catching up with him.

How do you break it to a kid that you no longer have the whole world in your hands?? Being that Dalen was the 1st grandchild, 1st great grandchild, 1st nephew and child of ours he has never been in the shadows. But boy does he have a rude awakening coming shortly!

Every baby shower gift he has been able to get his hands on he has tried to squeeze his oversized body into. I was calling around about cribs this morning to see who had our crib in stock and he overheard me. He then began questioning, "Why do I need a new tib (crib)? What's wrong with my tib (crib)?" He has also regressed greatly in the field of potty training and I was so darn determined to NOT have two kids in diapers! UGH!

Of course I knew and know we will have a lot to work on and much transition will be hard on all of us but do kids just gradually realize they are no longer the axis that spins the earth? I am starting to get a little worried about how he will react to Little Lady.

The Same Page??

There was always one thing my parents did perfectly. It drove me in sane at times but I have to give it to them, us girls never knew it if they weren't on the same page. They never criticized each other in front of us or challenged the authority of one another. This is something that is really difficult to put into play. Especially because we are new parents and it's hard to come to the same conclusion but we are trying.

Well, I thought we were. This story happened just hours ago and it's already something we are laughing at but trust me I was totally ticked when I first found out what happened. Lately we have been trying to train Dalen to play with a few of his larger toys in his room alone. So far, its been a challenge but I have to admit he is starting to do pretty good.

I noticed, while doing some things in the kitchen, that Mario got some paper towels and took them to Dalen's room. Instantly, I knew. I knew something was going on between those two but I figured if it involved paper towels then it involved cleaning so I didn't pressure for an explanation after asking once what they were for because I didn't want to feel obligated to clean anything else. (Yep, I am that lazy!)

Please keep in mind, I cooked, did the dishes, laundry, bathed Dalen and Mario put him in clean pajamas just about 30 minutes prior to this event. My butt was calling for the couch. Dalen was in his room for sometime and talking to himself and singing. Mario left to grab some Starbucks for us and I got that feeling, that feeling every mother knows intimately-it's your mother's intuition that can't be ignored. Literally, as soon as I got it, Dalen yelled from his room, "How do you spell my name?" Hmm, I thought, "Why would he need to know that??" Seconds later my dad called and I heard Dalen say, "You stay in there Mommy. Don't come to my room."

Then while I was on the phone there was a deafening silence. Oh yeah, this is it I thought. Something is totally going on back there. Mario got back and I heard him talking quietly to Dalen and in walked my child. He was covered in blue Expo marker. Then it all made sense. Mario had given him paper towels to erase the marker on his new white board he had gotten. He gave him the marker! GRRR!!!! That sneaky con!

As soon as we opened that gift we had an agreement that Dalen wasn't ever allowed to draw on the board without us present because white board markers stain so bad. But Mario just had to be Mr. Cool Guy. Needless to say, he got to scrub Dalen raw and get the marker off. I am just praising God it wasn't his bedding or walls!

Notice he is clutching to Daddy tonight.
Human Body Art

My sister said it best...no matter how good of a dad you are, you will NEVER be a mom.

You Know You're Pregnant...

Here are my top ten ways of knowing your are pregnant...

You know you are pregnant when you fill your bathtub half full of water and by the time you are sitting in it, it's overflowing on the floor.

You know are pregnant when you pray for a report of swelling from your doctor just so you have an excuse for excessive weight gain.

You know you are pregnant when you fantasize about winning the lottery and the 1st thing you would pay for would be stretch mark laser removal.

You know you are pregnant when the ONLY thing that is keeping you from getting sweets from the bakery is their lack of a drive-thru.

You know you are pregnant when you wait for your toddler to go to bed before you bring out the leftover baby shower cupcakes JUST so you don't have to share.

You know you are pregnant when you are exhausted but can't sleep because you started dreaming of food and lay awake waiting for the dream to come true.

You know you are pregnant when you have no plans but eating and sleeping and if any come up they HAVE to revolve around meal time and your daily nap.

You know you are pregnant when you nap longer than your toddler and if you don't get that nap your are crankier than your toddler would be without his nap.

You know you are pregnant when you refuse to throw out bags of expired frozen vegetables b-c you are saving them for your aching boobs.

And last but not least you know you are pregnant when you have stopped counting the pounds and started counting the stretch marks-too bad the pounds can be lost but those darn stretch marks...they are just a whole different stubborn story.

Family Funnies

Well, let's just start with today. My darling husband let me sleep in until a whopping 9:30 am! I was up and down all night with contractions and an upset stomach. Too bad they were consistent enough! I am so ready to have this kid. Anyways, Dalen has to have his tubes checked once a month-annoying, but he LOVES his dr.-and today was the day.

Here is a pic of Dalen in the BIG exam chair which he just loves b-c it raises in the air.

And here is his precious dr. who can't be a day younger than 79 1/2! I love him and so does Dalen. I just want to pinch him and tell him you are toe tweet!

Anyways, after Dalen's appointment the dr. always offers him a sucker and Dalen of course went crazy! He took off out the door, down the hall and little Mr. MIA was discovered in the main office standing right under the sucker jar. Wow, how in the world?! The doctor laughed...kinda...and gave him a sucker. Dalen clapped, jumped and squealed and the dr. responded to his little celebration with, "Well, hot diggity dog!" Dalen ripped the paper off this sucker and began to lick away and then responded with a huge smile, "Well, hot puppy dogs!" LOL! Hilarious.

I allowed Dalen to stay in church on Sunday morning to listen to the music and they sang Satan The Blood of Jesus Is Against You. Yes you could tell there was some excitement in the hearts of believers on Sunday. Dalen loved this song and has been singing it all week. He has the words a little confused and keeps singing, "Satan the blood of Jesus, I forgive you!" Oops!

After this being his song selection for the week and begging to eat at Holiday Inn we are certain he has Church of God genes roaming in his blood.
Last night while I was getting out of the shower, in ran Dalen. He patted my belly and said, "Aww, Tola (cola) still in that belly?" I told him yes but began to explain she would be coming out VERY soon. He started jumping and laughing and said, "Oh tool (cool), Tola's toming (coming) on an airplane!" And I thought, I surely wish a runway could be used as her exit ramp because this whole c-section thing is going to NOT be fun!
And last but not least-Dalen was put into time out AGAIN at school. Only this time for hitting. His afternoon teacher told me (who also works with our college ministry) that she told him if he didn't stop she would call Mario and Dalen said you tan't (can't) he isn't home. She then told him she meant on his cell phone and he lied and said, "Daddy, doesn't have a cell phone!" That little conniving booger! He is a mess! And while we are talking cell phones-my charger broke so I had to go to Verizon and I won't lie-I let Dalen be THAT kid. He ran around pushing a million buttons on all sorts of phones while I waited for an eternity to be rung up. He finally found a laptop thing in the store just as I was ready to go and I told him it was time to go. He turned around with such an attitude and said, "Mom, I am on the internet!" Oh my word I thought I was going to die. You would swear he is hitting puberty with his little eye rolling and attitude when he is interrupted.

Shower Me With Love

This weekend has been so great so far. Friday night we went to dinner with friends and then played Wii. Yes, I played Wii. Let me tell you, the whole thing was quite hysterical and pics may come later.

Saturday my friends threw me a shower and I was showered with love! I didn't think you had more than one shower but I was approached and asked if my friends could throw me another one and who in their right mind would decline?

I am so excited about having a baby tv monitor to stalk my little one on. Even though we live in a small house if I get out of bed I am up for a long time. I think this monitor will let me know if the movement I am hearing or any insecurities I am sensing are worth getting up for. I am so excited and actually feel techie. Ha
Here is a shot of my friends who hosted the shower. Thanks to all of them for all of their effort. Everything was perfect. Oh, and me and Katie weren't fighting I was just trying to dodge Abby's fancy chandelier.
The set-up! All kinds of yummy goodies including one of my most favorite dips (corn and jalapeno). And who could forget the red velvet cupcakes-which match the babies room :)
I just loved this!
And now to all of you who wondered what Dalen did while I was away...Dalen attended a birthday party for a friend. He was turning 1 and it was a circus theme. There was a clown, dove, rabbit and LOTS of candy. When he came home he was running full force with a wad of gum in his mouth and shaking this poor goldfish all about in a ziploc baggy. I used to have a lot of fish so I was so excited about the newest addition to the family. Yes, I know I will be cleaning the bowl but what's one more thing to clean with the plethora of others on our list?
Can you tell Dalen's happy? He named him Fishie Hood and at one point we thought he was dead after he laid helpless at the bottom of the bowl. I tapped, talked and even jostled the vase around a little but he didn't move. I told Dalen he was dead and he ran to the vase and said, "Oh tap (crap)!" Sorry, but Mario and I BOTH had to laugh. Minutes later an orange flash caught my attention and Fishie Hood was swimming about again. Death, where is thy sting??

Dalen kept trying to open the baggie while I searched for a home for the fish. I explained to him he could NOT open the bag because Fishie Hood would die and Dalen began to stomp and whine, "But Mommy he's getting wet!" LOL! Oh, I feel some funny blogs coming on about our new friend-I just hope they don't involve digestion and poop watching!

Family Funnies

Just to be safe the doctor told me on Tuesday I need to take the rest of the week off due to my contractions, dilating, fluid problem (which we think we have under control) and random contractions. To be honest, I have forgotten all that your day entails with a two year old in tow. I am so hoping after having this baby I get some energy.

Wednesday, Mario had to be at the church helping with things and I promise Dalen would NOT leave my side. He was all over me! I literally could barely breath. The most exciting thing I did was fold clothes on the couch with Dalen laying on top of me. He thought it was so fun to literally suffocate me. Here are a few pics of us "enjoying" the day.
Earlier that morning I found Dalen walking around with a whole jug of orange juice. He had gotten in the fridge all alone and gotten it out. I also heard him in there not long after that taking a lunchable out and getting it somewhat open. I found him eating it....for breakfast. Then later he was begging for "snowman tooties (cookies)". A few minutes later he came running in the living room with a mouth full of cookie dough. Wow, he's worse than me and I am 35 weeks pregnant! We finally realized he calls cookie dough snowman cookies because he thinks the Pillsbury dough boy is a snowman. HILARIOUS!
These are the latest pics of his most recent bubble bath at my parents. Yeah, he def. got that white Christmas! The tub was practically overflowing with bubbles. You can tell how fun he has in there.

We now have little lady's playpen and swing set-up in her room. That was NOT as easy as we thought it would be! While I cooked dinner on Tuesday I heard Dalen in and out of her room and Mario explaining a lot of things including not to touch ANYTHING. I let Dalen sit on the counter while I cooked and he played drums with spatulas. He began talking to me and said, "Mommy, no touch Tola's (Cola's) tib (crib). It was verrrryyyy pensive (expensive)." This kid cracks me up.

Night Owl-Hear Me Hoot

Somehow, I am not sure how, when I stumbled into bed (after being asleep on the couch for sometime) I noticed Dalen's bushy fro was tickling the end of my nose. It's all still a blur, but I can't remember what landed him in bed with us. Needless to say, I have given up on trying to get any shut eye next to him. After about 21 punches to the headboard and him calling out, "Da, da, da" in his sleep he landed me in the living room, on the couch (which I am sure will have an eternal dent in it from me sleeping on it so much), wide awake. So night owls, hear me hoot.

For the last 45 minutes I have realized how un-cool I am. Flats make my feet sweat and I have to buy them in WIDE or they usually don't fit. I actually thought, when I 1st heard of skinny jeans, that they were jeans made to make you look thin, I QUICKLY learned otherwise. I can hardly ever stay up passed ten. I've only cried in one movie, Annie. I wasn't in a greek club. I can count how many friends I have on two hands, literally. I get extremely defensive when people talk about Dalen's hair and make fun of it and sometimes it even hurts my heart. I was 21 before I ever had a pedicure. I cry every time I have to have a pap smear, even after 2 pregnancies. I drive a 1995 Toyota Camry with small rust spots on the hood. If I feel like it, I call to check on my son at school. I never, EVER buy name brand stuff unless its red lined or from somewhere like TJ Maxx. I screen movies before I see them and end up finding some reason to not lower my standards by viewing what I have concluded as trash. These are just some random facts-just in case any of you thought I was cool-yeah, now you know, I am such a dork.

No, I am not delirious due to the hour, but I started thinking about this after watching Beth Moore's session from Passion 2010. (Oh, that's another thing that makes me super un-cool, I am not a big fan of Louie. I think he is quite long winded at times and I think he could make his simplistic and relevant points in a lot less time. Stone me later.) Anyways, I love Beth Moore! LOVE her! I was so thrilled she was given such an amazing opportunity to speak to so many young people. I just love her humor and passion when she speaks. She is so open and not afraid to admit her true feelings about things. I've done like three of her studies now and gosh, I just realize that even though I think she is SOOO beautiful, stylish, transparent and cool-it's obvious she begs to differ with some of the comments she makes.

I know that I have a similar calling to her. No, let me clarify, I am certain I will never pack out an area or write an organized study or ever have anything published at all, but I think I am called to share. That's it, just share. Sometimes sharing is the most difficult thing to do especially when you are dishing out servings of the inner most parts of your being. Those personal places that no one has ever been but God, those places are so hard to reveal. That's one thing I love about her-she can reveal some not so pretty details about her life and past and women all over the world feel as though they have been served from a silver platter.

How does she do that? How does she makes women feel so catered to by just sharing? How does she take those scary confessions & make women all over the world feel connected and special? Wow, that's a gift, something supernatural. But I know God is calling me to do more of that. He is calling me to share. Share life with others. That is not easy for me! I mean come on God, I am the lady who won't offer a God bless you to the sneezer at Wal-Mart in fear that, that person will end up talking too long and taking my precious time. I am awful I know but I am just not a naturally gifted people person. I try to be but it just doesn't come natural. Wouldn't it be so much easier for God to make me rich and ask me to give? Trust me, I know what it is to live without money and I am used to it so I don't think it would be as hard to give as it is to share myself.

But think about it, what is God calling you to do more of? What simple thing is he desiring to make divine for the spiritual well being of others?

Wal-Mart:The ultimate place for learning

It's true. Wal-Mart is the ultimate place for learning. I don't know about you but I do know that I learn more about myself, my community, and products at this often dreaded place. I had to run there today for work and here is what I learned. Now these lessons come from today's visit only so keep in mind how much I have learned in my whole life.

1) A few flurries surely put my small town community in a awfully BIG frenzy! Yikes! Don't ever go down the milk or bread aisle when the weatherman is calling for snow! What ever happened to being prepared??

2) Don't ever make direct eye contact with someone who is coughing or offer a God bless you to someone who sneezes UNLESS you are prepared to hear a 30 minute grype session on how sick they have been this season and if you are that heartfelt sucker who just can't keep walking when your whole entire body begins to tingle-DON'T PANIC-that's just your skin crawling when you realize Wal-Mart is a pool of germs just waiting to take you out. Yes, that song How Could You Be So Heartless was written just for me. I try to care but sometimes (most of the time) I just want to get where I am going and get home.

3) Never assume going to the automotive check-out line or parking lot is quicker than just going through the main entrances ESPECIALLY if poor Paul is working. Bless his heart-and I totally mean that! He takes very deep breaths between every move he makes and appears to be in constant pain. Today he couldn't even reach across the counter to finish scanning my items. I looked at him thinking, "Listen buddy, with the size of my belly I can't reach much either so either you meet me half way or we are going to be having a serious problem!"

4) Always, always sanitize before entering and upon leaving. I am so serious when I say this. I have never heard more people hacking and seen more kids picking boogers than today. UGH! I have learned the cashiers actually seem to appreciate you asking to use some of their sanitizer that they ALL keep handy, unless it's Paul. Well, he doesn't mind as long as he doesn't have to reach for it.

5) If you aren't a woman and ESPECIALLY if you are a single male do not read this one (you will surely never impregnate your wife after reading this). But today I learned Wal-Mart undies (even brand new) just don't hold my sagging tush like a good pair of Victoria's Secret. The fabric is thin and the elastic is weak-take my word for it!

PS-Does anyone know if Wal-Mart takes underwear back? The package is open but I only tried one pair on! They were $7 and trust me, we need every buck we can get!

Not so glamorous but oh, so rewarding!

Now that I am getting ready to have my second baby and I have been spending so much time with my parents for the holidays, I have been thinking a lot about motherhood. I have to confess it is nothing I thought it would be. For all of the unglamorous aspects of being a mom there seems to always be some shiny, golden reward that follows (not instantly but at some point the reward comes).

I do not want to make motherhood sound like a hassle or a horrible thing because the truth is-it's the most AMAZING, God-given responsibility I have ever been entrusted with BUT sometimes I do think society and Hollywood glamorize motherhood a little more than they should. I mean, don't you just love the pics of skinny minnie Nicole Ritchie, with little Harlow on her hip and a Prada bag on her shoulder? Or how about little Suri dressed better than any of us in her little heels and glowing glossed lips?

I think a teen pregnancy center should do a campaign ad with a mother peed on or puked on to really portray what a lot of your days are like and then it should read-Not So Glamorous. Anyways-on to my sweet revelation about motherhood. I am realizing more and more there is always a reward that follows. Here are a few examples.

Not So Glamorous-Being peed on IN THE FACE by Dalen when he was about 3 months old.
Oh, So Rewarding-Hearing that steady stream of urine hit in the potty for the 1st time.

Not So Glamorous-Dalen demanding things at the top of his lungs in public and throwing a tantrum when he doesn't get them
Oh So Rewarding-Hearing the sound of polite bliss as please and thank you come from his mouth (occaisonally, we are still working on it)

Not So Glamorous-Carrying a 30 lb. child on my hip, while juggling my keys, phone and purse that in real life DOES NOT stay on your shoulder and trying to walk steadily while 8 months pregnant
Oh So Rewarding-Holding one on each knee and reading bedtime stories and singing (I can just imagine what that will be like).

The rewards just keep coming and coming. I have really been trying to reflect on the rewarding aspects of this full time job more than the unglamorous things I am experiencing on a day to day basis. Somedays, I will not lie, it's incredibly hard. When the stinch of puke is still in your nostrils and the puddle of pee is still under your feet because he just happened to miss, it's hard to catch the gleam from that reward I will one day reap but I am trying.

So to all the mother's and nursery workers and caretakers here's one to ya!

Best Forgotten but Always Remembered

Well fellow bloggers, I much to catch you up on. Tuesday I went to the doctor for my now weekly appointment (that's when you know you are REALLY close!). I hadn't been feeling well but couldn't really explain what was going on. I love my doctor she is so thorough. My stomach was measuring "significantly smaller" than two weeks before. To make a long story short my amniotic fluid had dropped "on the low side of low" (yeah, that's exactly what they said) and it was making my stomach measure smaller.

So of course I had to have that dreaded exam to make sure I wasn't leaking fluid and to see if I was dilated. I am currently 2 1/2 cm. dilated and my doctor felt I was probably more dilated but didn't want to cause me to dilate more by bothering me too much. I was sent home to rehydrate and ordered to take Wednesday off. My fluid was back up 40% on Wednesday! Wahoo! No leak in my amniotic sac and I am still supposed to take it easy so I don't keep dilating. I have 5 weeks left.

I cheered in the New Year with friends and our whole family. It was such an awesome night. We did nothing but laugh, laugh, laugh...oh, and I ate, ate, ate. Our party consisted of Abby's new game Loaded Questions (such a fun one) and the infamous Apples to Apples. I have mention all the great food (which I tasted all of-over and over). We had wonderful potato soup, all kinds of dips and desserts. Dalen was wonderful and didn't go to sleep until after 10! That's super late for him and just minutes before 12 I looked over to find him stretching and waking up for all of the cheering and group hug. Within minutes he was full throttle all over the place.

Dalen waking just minutes before 12.

Me & Crystal

This is a picture of me that would be best forgotten but always remembered.

Please let me tell you how out of place I was as my skinny bean pole friends talked about

training for a marathon as I had to report in Loaded Questions that most painful body part

I had was my pelvis. Anyways, in case you were wondering here is what 200+ lbs. looks like.

The blond all the way on the end is Mrs. Madden who made all of the GREAT food. I am sure I will NOT be thanking her the next time I have to get on the scale at my appointment.

Dalen began puking everywhere at Ham. Place yesterday. After hours of him consistently puking we took him to the ER to get some nausea meds and to find out he either had the horrible bug going around or food poisoning. He is MUCH MUCH better this am and taking advantage of the doctor ordering him to down lots of popsicles to keep him hydrated. Don't worry they are sugar free.

2009 is full of great memories for me but also full of some that are best forgotten but will always be remembered. I think we can look at life and realize that is what makes life-a bunch of memories that aren't so significant now, but at one time completely rocked our world, which is why they are always remembered.